personal development


Compliments can affect our mood and how we feel about ourselves. For both the giver and receiver, a compliment can let’s us see ourselves in a new and different light.… But why do we reject it?

Hello there! Welcome back here again!

RELAX!!!!! Try not to freak out because of the title. Lol, allow me to explain myself. This is how most people think.

This is something we do very often unconsciously, we are always quick to reject compliments. When someone gives us a compliment we are so quick to attack it and we downplay ourselves.

As you read this, expand your thought on compliments because compliments come in different forms. You can get complimented for the way you look or dress but as you read this think about compliments beyond looks or appearances.

A person can get complimented for anything maybe for an idea, a job well done, a skill, or anything.

Seriously, I always thought that to reject compliments was only a Nigerian thing, but NO!

Brushing off compliments is something common and it seems as if we were trained to do it.

Someone walks up to you and says ” Ohhh, Your hair looks nice” and the next thing you do is reject it or you even explain or try to justify why you think the hair is ugly “The stylist did not braid it well”.

Like seriously? Why didn’t you braid it yourself?

This is something I do very often. There were times people walk to me and say “Oppy, I love your dress”…Who made it? and this was my reply

“The tailor didn’t make the dress well, it is supposed to look a certain way”. Thinking about it now, I ask myself, why did I have to downplay the tailor’s abilities?

What if the person was planning to get her dress made from her? I just spoilt the tailor’s skills.

There was a time my friend complimented me and I opposed it. She said this to me ” I know you are humble”.

I was so scared to accept it because I didn’t want to be tagged arrogant (Lol), please don’t judge me.

I noticed that this is a thing and it needs to stop. We are scared to receive or accept compliments to avoid being tagged as “An arrogant person”. Some people even want to appear polite or humble so they opt to reject compliments. STOP IT!.

All the compliments you have received till now, you deserve it.

Common Compliments We Reject.

A. ” I love your shoes”

Reply: “I borrowed it”…who asked you? lol.

B. ” You look beautiful this morning”

Reply: “It’s the makeup…”

Really? Why do you have to underestimate yourself?


. It is rude

Opposing compliments is very rude, STOP BEING RUDE. Someone has taken their precious time to tell you something good about yourself and the person has taken his/her strength to smile at you, don’t waste people ‘s time by opposing compliments.

The person has seen something good about you and has taken the time to tell you. When you brush it off you spread negative vibes. Your negativity has canceled out the person’s positivity and he won’t even bother saying anything to you next time.

I had an experience sometimes ago. Lady A walked up to me and told me I looked beautiful

Lady A: Oppy, you look beautiful

Me: Please don’t tease me, I didn’t get enough sleep and my face is swollen.

Lady A replied and said ” That was rude, learn to accept compliments”

My eyes widened, I was shocked I didn’t expect that type of reply, my heart started racing, I felt like the ground should make way so that I could hide under LoL.

I later understood how lady A felt when I gave someone a compliment and she rejected it. I gave her the same reply the lady A gave me.

. Boost your confidence

If you are someone that struggles with low self-esteem and you reject compliments, please consider accepting a compliment, and don’t be quick to brush off any nice word someone tells you. You deserve it. I know struggling with low self-esteem is very difficult, and rejecting compliments won’t help you at all.

If someone appreciates anything you do or your looks be glad, smile, and say thank you. When you get home, tell it your self again and again even if you don’t believe it. It can boost your confidence by 5%.

When a friend or a stranger compliments you, write it down in a book and go back to look at it again when you are in self-doubt.

Most especially there are compliments for you in the scripture, start by accepting and believing what God has called you!.

. You are worth it!

Start by thinking positively about yourself.” I’m beautiful without makeup!. Why do we always think less of ourselves?. We somehow think that we don’t deserve applause.

There was a time I was always thinking less of myself and very good at spotting out my flaws. So even if anyone tells me the opposite of what I thought I was, I wouldn’t accept it.


Here is a challenge for you.

Try to remember all the compliments you have received and opposed, and TELL IT TO YOURSELF.

In conclusion, next time you receive a compliment and even when you think you don’t deserve it SMILE 😊 and SAY THANK YOU!.

(15) Comments

  1. Phunbell says:

    This is nice.
    Many needs to learn this

    1. Thank u sis❤

      1. Precious says:

        This is really nice and its something I do alot thanks for the encouragement

        1. You welcome darl❤

    2. Kiitan says:

      The part that struck me was “rejecting compliment is rude”. Really I thought was a way of showing humility.
      I learnt something new, thanks for this piece.

      1. You are welcome.

  2. Sistoyin says:

    I so much love the write up.

    Thanks for this Sis.
    More Grace.

    1. Thank you

      1. You’re absolutely right Oppy and even though rejecting compliment happens a whole lot across the world, Nigeria has its own special blend trust me… LoL

        It’s so easy for us to push compliments aside even when we hardly receive them.

        Thanks for changing my thinking today!

        1. That’s so true, our Nigerian mindset plays out in rejecting compliments.

          Thank you for reading too 😀

  3. Adékunbí says:

    Good stuff Ope and I
    thank you for this.

    1. Thank you Kunbi

  4. Toluwalope Ilerioluwa says:

    Scream it sis,let the people at the back hear oo, very apt dear, very! Like who taught us to always downplay ourselves….God bless you, gracias.

    1. Thank you

  5. You’re absolutely right Oppy and even though rejecting compliment happens a whole lot across the world, Nigeria has its own special blend trust me… LoL

    It’s so easy for us to push compliments aside even when we hardly receive them.

    Thanks for changing my thinking today!

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